Proverbs 27:5

Pro 27:5 Open rebuke [is] better than secret love.

Ver. 5. Open rebuke is better than secret love.] For, after the nature of pills, rebuke, though it be not toothsome, yet it is wholesome, and a sure sign of a faithful friend, if rightly managed. See my Common Place of Admonition. Secret love, that either seeth nothing amiss in a friend, or dare not say so, is little worth in comparison. "Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thy heart," but, as an argument of thy love, "thou shalt reprove him," plainly, but wisely, "and not suffer sin upon him," {Lev 19:17} much less further it, and be his broker or pander in it, as Hirah the Adullamite was to his friend Judah, and Jonadab to his cousin Amnon. {2Sa 13:5}

John Trapp, A Commentary or Exposition upon All the Books of the Old and New Testament (1647–1656) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

Pro_27:5-6

Open rebuke is better than secret love.

Charitable reproof

Self-love is so natural to us, that as it makes us apt to flatter ourselves on all occasions, so it inclines us to accept too easily of the flatteries of all others. Our unwillingness to know our own faults, or to be humbled under the sense of them, makes us uneasy when any venture on the most charitable, but often the most unacceptable, act of friendship, the telling us of our faults. But so long as we have faults it is very fit that we be made acquainted with them. And since we are too much blinded in our own favour, it is a great happiness to fall Into the hands of such friends as will not spare us. No man can perform this act of friendship without some force put upon himself. Few love to touch a tender part, or to grieve a person who is dear to them. Friends see faults while they are yet secret, before they break out into open observation; so by the kind severity of their rebukes, they save from the shame which the discoveries that envy will soon make may bring. Friendship that carries a man to rebuke another plainly and roundly is better than secret love, or silent, indulgent, blind love. Such reproofs may be as wounds, and give a very painful uneasiness; but even that will be medicinal. The first and necessary rule in managing our reproofs is, that no man should offer to reprove another, who is eminently and notoriously faulty himself. Another is, reprove in such a manner that it may appear we are their friends whom we reprove, and that we correct them for their own good. So much depends on the temper in which reproof is given. The most comprehensive rule is to order our reproofs with discretion and prudence. The things of which we find fault should be things of importance. Junior and inferior persons should not usually reprove their elders and superiors. And a wise and prudent time should be chosen. Take care that it is not a mere finding fault upon some general and popular notions. Illustrate such things as lewd conversation, swearing, etc. (Bp. Gilbert.)

False love

The contrast is not between open reproof and love that is not real, but only affected, and assuming the garb and manner of what is real, flatters and imposes upon its object. This could not, with propriety, be called secret love. It is professed love hiding enmity or indifference. Secret love is love which is indeed real, but which fails to speak out faithfully when it ought--when the good of its object calls for such fidelity; which shrinks from doing so because it is unwilling to inflict present pain; which thus connives at existing evils--silently allowing them to pass when they are such as ought to be noticed and reprehended. This is a false love, which really injures its object. (R. Wardlaw, D.D.)

The Biblical Illustrator, edited by Joseph S. Exell (c. 1880s–1900s) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

Pro 27:5-6. Open rebuke is better than secret love — “He that takes an ingenuous liberty to tell others of their faults, and rebukes them freely, when need requires, to their face, is a better friend, a more valuable, though, perhaps, he may please less, than he who hath more of the passion of love in his heart, but makes it not known by such good effects. The parable, says Lord Bacon, reprehends the soft nature of such friends as will not use the privilege which friendship gives them, in admonishing their friends with freedom and confidence, as well of their errors as of their danger.” See Dodd. Faithful are the wounds — The sharpest reproofs; of a friend — They proceed from an upright, loving, and faithful heart, and really promote the good of the person reproved; but the kisses — All the fair speeches and outward professions of friendship; of an enemy are deceitful — Hebrew, נעתרות, are to be deprecated, are perfidious and pernicious, and therefore are such things as one may properly pray to God to be delivered from.

Joseph Benson's Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1811–1818) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

CRITICAL NOTES.—

Pro_27:5. Secret love. Zöckler and Hitzig understand this love to be that “which from false consideration dissembles, and does not tell his friend of his faults when it should do so.” Delitzsch thinks it refers to “love which is confined to the heart alone, like a fire which, when it burns secretly, neither lightens nor warms.”

MAIN HOMILETICS OF THE PARAGRAPH.—Pro_27:5-6; Pro_27:9-11; Pro_27:14

TESTS OF FRIENDSHIP

We group these verses together because they all treat of the same subject, viz., friendship in reality and friendship in profession only. The same subject occurred in the preceding chapter (see on Pro_27:23-27, and in chap. Pro_17:17-18, page 519.)

I. He does not love us truly who does not love us well enough to tell us of our faults. The true friend must desire to see the object of his affection as free from faults as it is possible for him to be; the truest and the purest love seeks by every means within its reach to bless the beloved one. And as we should not consider him a friend who would make no effort to free us from any bodily disease or physical deformity, we ought not to call him an enemy who will strive to rid us of moral and spiritual blemishes. For such an one gives proof that he cares more for our ultimate good than for our present smile—he shows that he is even willing to risk our displeasure in the hope of doing us real kindness. He who gives us kisses when he ought to give us reproof, or who holds back deserved rebuke from cowardice, is more cruel than if he withheld from us an indispensable medicine simply because it had a bitter taste. For if we will not take the unpleasant draught from the hand that we have clasped in friendship, we are not likely to find it more pleasant when administered by a stranger, much less by an enemy. And if a wound is to be probed it is surely better for the patient that it should be done by a skilful and tender hand than by one who has no sympathy with us and no acquaintance with our inner life. And as it is certain that those who do not love us will either rebuke us for our faults or despise us on account of them, the real friend is he who, by a loving faithfulness, strives to rid us of them. What would have become of David if Nathan had lacked the courage to say to him, “Thou art the man.”

II. Such a true friend is the most refreshing and invigorating influence that can bless our life. Setting aside the blessing and strength which come to man direct from his Father in heaven, there is no source whence he can derive so much help and comfort as from the hearty sympathy and sound advice of a real friend. They are like the anointing oil and perfume which refresh the weary Eastern traveller at the end of his day’s journey, removing the traces of toil and the sense of fatigue, and putting new life into every limb. Life is a dusty, toilsome highway for most men, and they sorely stand in need of some soothing and renewing influence as they pursue the journey. And this, Solomon assures us—and experience confirms his assurance—is to be found in hearty friendship.

III. The cultivation and retention of such friends should be one of the aims of life. Seeing that there is no other means by which we are so likely to get a true acquaintance with ourselves, and no other earthly influence which is so likely at once to elevate and console us, we ought to try and make real friends and be faithful to our friendships after they are formed. And especially we ought ever gratefully to remember the friends of our youth—those who gave us help and counsel when we most needed them, and to whose faithfulness and forbearance we probably owe far more than we can ever rightly estimate. There is a proneness in the youth as he rises into manhood, and is probably removed from early associations and lifted into a higher social sphere, to forget his earliest and truest friend, but the truly wise and honourable man will count fidelity to such a sacred duty.

OUTLINES AND SUGGESTIVE COMMENTS

Pro_27:6. Many indeed profess their value for a true friend; and yet in the most valuable discharge of friendship, they “count him their enemy.” The apostle had some just apprehension on this account, though so wise and affectionate, and speaking from the mouth of God. (Gal_4:12-16). As if the rule of friendship was, that we should absolutely “please,” without reference to the Divine restriction—“for good to edification.” (Rom_15:2). Christian faithfulness is the only way of acting up to our profession. And much guilt lies upon the conscience in the neglect. But this open rebuke must not contravene the express rule of love—“telling the fault between thee and him alone.” Too often, instead of pouring it secretly into our brother’s ear, it is proclaimed through the wide medium of the world’s ear, and thus it passes through a multitude of channels before it reaches its one proper destination. The openness of the rebuke describes the free and unreserved sincerity of the heart, not necessarily the public exposure of the offender; save when the character of the offence, or the interests of others, may appear to demand it. (1Ti_5:20).—Bridges.

This is that false love which really injures its object; and which, on this account,—that is, from its injurious tendency, how little soever designed, gets in the Scriptures the designation of hatred: “Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thine heart: thou shalt in any wise rebuke thy neighbour, and not suffer sin upon him.” (Lev_19:17).—Wardlaw.

Pro_27:9. The best physic for man is man. For friendship is a kind of life to man, without which there is no comfort of a man’s life. Friendship is in men a kind of step to God, and by means of love man draweth near to God, when, as from being the friend of man, he is made the friend of God. But as among the Jews there was no oil that did so rejoice the heart as that wherewith the kings were anointed; no perfume that did so delight the soul as that which the priest offered; in like manner as there is no friend so sweet as God, so there is no counsel that doth so glad the soul, so cheer the heart, as that which He giveth in His word, whereby we are made even kings and priests unto him.—Jermin.

The heartiness of a friend’s counsel constitutes its excellence. It is not official, or merely intelligent. It is the counsel of his soul.—Bridges.

Pro_27:10. “Neither go into thy brother’s house in the day of thy calamity.” This has certainly the appearance of a very strange advice. Whither, in the day of our calamity, should we go, if not to the house of a brother? Where are we to expect a kind reception, and the comfort we require, if not there? But the proverb, like all others, must be understood generally, and applied in the circumstances and the sense obviously and mainly designed. The meaning seems to be either—

1. Do not choose “the day of thy calamity” for making thy visit, if thou hast not shown the same inclination to court and cultivate intimacy before, in the day of thy success and prosperity. This unavoidably looks not like the impulse of affection, but of felt necessity, or convenience and self-interest: “Ay, ay,” your brother will be naturally apt to say, “I saw little of you before: you are fain to come to me now, when you feel your need of me, and fancy I may be of some service to you.” Or,

2. Let not sympathy be forced and extorted. “In the day of thy calamity,” if thy brother has the heart of a brother, and really feels for thee, he will come to thee; he will seek and find thee. If he does not, then do not press yourself upon his notice, as if you would constrain and oblige him to be kind. This may, and probably will, have the effect of disgusting and alienating him, rather than gaining his love. Love and sympathy must be unconstrained as well as unbought. When they are either got by a bribe, or got by dint of urgent solicitation, they are alike heartless, and alike worthless. The reason is—“For better is a neighbour that is near, than a brother far off. The antithetical phrases “at hand” and “far off,” have evident reference here, not to locality, but to disposition. A friendly and kindly-disposed neighbour, who bears no relation to us save that of neighbourhood, is greatly preferable to a brother—to any near relation whatever that is cold, distant, and alienated.—Wardlaw.

The proverbial sense is, that better is a lesser comfort which is ready at hand, than a greater solace which we must go to seek after.—Jermin.

Pro_27:14. It is an excellent description of a notorious flatterer, and a just denunciation of his due reward. First, he blesseth with a loud voice, as if he wanted breath and sides to set out the praises of his friend, and as if he would not only awaken him with the news of it but many others also with the loudness of it. Secondly, he doth it rising early, as if it were some main and principal business which he had to do, and wherein he would show himself more forward than any others. Thirdly, he doth it in the morning, as if he would bless his friend before he blessed God, or rather would make him his God by offering his sacrifice of praise unto him.—Jermin.

The Preacher's Complete Homiletical Commentary (gen. ed. Joseph S. Exell; Funk & Wagnalls, c. 1892) — public domain (pre-1929). A full-Bible homiletical/sermon-outline anthology covering 65 of 66 books (2 John is absent from the source module). Text from a community e-Sword module.

27:5 A rebuke improves life by correcting harmful behavior (13:1; 14:6). Hidden, unexpressed love has no value.

Tyndale Open Study Notes — © Tyndale Open Resources, licensed CC BY-SA 4.0. Text via the HelloAO Bible API.

Note, 1. It is good for us to be reproved, and told of our faults, by our friends. If true love in the heart has but zeal and courage enough to show itself in dealing plainly with our friends, and reproving them for what they say and do amiss, this is really better, not only than secret hatred (as Lev 19:17), but than secret love, that love to our neighbours which does not show itself in this good fruit, which compliments them in their sins, to the prejudice of their souls. Faithful are the reproofs of a friend, though for the present they are painful as wounds. It is a sign that our friends are faithful indeed if, in love to our souls, they will not suffer sin upon us, nor let us alone in it. The physician's care is to cure the patient's disease, not to please his palate. 2. It is dangerous to be caressed and flattered by an enemy, whose kisses are deceitful We can take no pleasure in them because we can put no confidence in them (Joab's kiss and Judas's were deceitful), and therefore we have need to stand upon our guard, that we be not deluded by them; they are to be deprecated. Some read it: The Lord deliver us from an enemy's kisses, from lying lips, and from a deceitful tongue.

Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible (1708–1710) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.

secret love--not manifested in acts is useless; and even, if its exhibition by rebukes wounds us, such love is preferable to the frequent (compare Margin), and hence deceitful, kisses of an enemy.

Jamieson, Fausset & Brown — Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible (1871) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.

Verse 5. Open rebuke is better than secret love.] Plutarch gives an account of a man who, aiming a blow at his enemy's life, cut open an imposthume, which by a salutary discharge saved his life, that was sinking under a disease for which a remedy could not be found. Partial friendship covers faults; envy, malice, and revenge, will exhibit, heighten, and even multiply them. The former conceals us from ourselves; the latter shows us the worst part of our character. Thus we are taught the necessity of amendment and correction. In this sense open rebuke is better than secret love. Yet it is a rough medicine, and none can desire it. But the genuine open-hearted friend may be intended, who tells you your faults freely but conceals them from all others; hence the sixth verse: "Faithful are the wounds of a friend."

Adam Clarke's Commentary on the Bible (1810–1826) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.

(5) Secret love—i.e., that never discloses itself in acts of kindness, not even in “open rebuke” when such is needed.

A Bible Commentary for English Readers, edited by Charles John Ellicott (1878–1897) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

5. secret] Better, with R.V., that is hidden; i.e. that does not manifest itself in rebuke, when it is needed.

Maurer quotes aptly from Seneca, Ep. 25, and Plautus Trinum. Acts 1. Sc. ii., 57; and also from Cicero, Lœl. 25:—“Ut igitur et monere et moneri proprium est veræ amicitiæ, et alteram libere facere, non aspere, alterum patienter accipere, non repugnanter; sic habendum est, nullam in amicitiis pestem esse majorem, quam adulationem, blanditiam, assentationem.”

The Cambridge Bible for Schools and Colleges (gen. ed. J. J. S. Perowne; Cambridge University Press, 1878–1918) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

Open rebuke is better than secret love. This is to be understood, not of rebuke publicly given; though Aben Ezra thinks public reproof is meant, which, arising from love, is better than that which is done in secret, though in love, as being more effectual; for rebuke among friends should be given privately, according to our Lord's direction, Mat 18:15; but it signifies reproof given faithfully and plainly, with openness of heart, and without mincing the matter, and palliating the offence; but speaking out freely, and faithfully laying before a person the evil of his sin, in all the circumstances of it, as the Apostle Paul did to Peter, when he withstood him to the face, because he was to be blamed, Gal 2:11. Now such kind of reproof is better than such love to a person as will not suffer him to tell him of his faults, for fear of grieving him, or losing his friendship; or than such love as does not show itself in deeds, and particularly in faithful reproofs; for so to act is to hate a person, and suffer sin to be upon him, Lev 19:17.

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Proverbs 27:6

pro 27:6

pro 27:6

pro 27:6Faithful are the wounds of a friend,.... That is, friendly reproofs; which, though they may be severe, at least thought so, and may grieve and wound, and cause pain and uneasiness for the present, yet, proceeding from a spirit of love, faithfulness, and integrity, and designed for the good of the person reproved, ought to be kindly received; see Psa 141:5;

but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful; flow from a deceitful heart, and not to be confided in, as the kisses of Joab and Judas. It may be rather rendered, "are to be deprecated" (y); prayed against, as real evils, hurtful and pernicious; and so the Targum renders it, "are evil". Good is the advice of Isocrates (z),

"reckon them faithful, not who praise everything thou sayest or doest, but those that reprove what is amiss.''

(y) "deprecanda", Junius & Tremillius, Piscator, Cocceius, Amama. (z) Ad Nicoclem, p. 38.

John Gill's Exposition of the Whole Bible (1746–1763) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API.

Secret love - Better, love that is hidden; i. e., love which never shows itself in this one way of rebuking faults. Rebuke, whether from friend or foe, is better than such love.

Albert Barnes' Notes on the Bible (1834–1885) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.

Love. Which can be of no service to us, while reproof may cause us to amend.

George Leo Haydock (1774–1849), Haydock's Catholic Family Bible and Commentary, 1859 edition — public domain. Excludes Psalms (Douay-Rheims chapter numbering differs from Protestant) and Deuterocanonical books (Catholic canon only).

Open rebuke, Heb. which is manifested or discovered, either,

1. Publicly and before others, when it is needful; in which case, though it put a man to some shame, yet it doth him good. Or,

2. Privately, and to the offender’s time, a plain and downright reproof.

Better; more desirable and beneficial.

Secret love; which lies hid in the heart, and doth not show itself by friendly actions, and particularly by free and faithful reproof, which is a principal end and benefit of friendship.

Matthew Poole's English Annotations on the Holy Bible (1683–1685) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword/MySword module.

5. Open rebuke — Whether it comes from friend or foe, is, like any other chastening, “not joyous, but grievous;” nevertheless, afterward it yieldeth, at least in good men, “the peaceable fruits of righteousness.”

Secret love — Love kept concealed, silent, inactive, is fruitless for good. It may refer to that love which, from false considerations, does not name one’s faults. Not “speaking the truth in love.” Eph_4:15.

Daniel D. Whedon (gen. ed.), Commentary on the Old and New Testaments (1874–1909) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

Open rebuke is better than secret love. Love that is hidden and never discloses itself in acts of self-denial or generosity, especially that which from fear of offending does not rebuke a friend, nor speak the truth in love, (Eph_4:15) when there is good reason for such openness such disguised love is worse, more objectionable, less beneficial, than the plain speaking which bravely censures a fault, and dares to correct what is wrong by well-timed blame. To hold back blame, it has been said, is to hold back love. "I love not my friend," wrote Seneca ("Ep.," 25), "if I do not offend him." Plautus, "Trinum.," 1:2, 57"Sed tu ex amicis certis mi es certissimus. Si quid scis me fecisse inscite aut improbe, Si id non me accusas, tu ipse objurgandus. Publ. Syr., "Sent.," 16, "Amici vitia si feras, facis tua," which Erasmus expounds by adding, "If you take no notice of your friend"s faults, they will be imputed to you." Cicero ("De Amicit.," 24, 25) has some sensible remarks on this subject: "When a man"s ears are shut against the truth, so that he cannot hear the truth from a friend, the welfare of such a one is hopeless. Shrewd is the observation of Cato, that some are better served by bitter enemies than by friends who seem to be agreeable; for the former often speak the truth, the latter never....As therefore both to give and receive advice is the characteristic of true friendship, and that the one should act with freedom, but not harshly, and that the other should accept remonstrance patiently and without resistance, so it should be considered that there is no deadlier bane to friendship than adulation, fawning, and flattery.

Vers. 5, 6, 9, 10, 17, 19. Four services of friendship. (And see homily on "Friendship," Pro_13:20) We have suggested in the nineteenth verse two conditions of friendship:

(1) likeness of character; and

(2) reciprocity in action.

There can be no true friendship where one heart does not answer to another as the face reflected from a mirror answers to that which is before it. Men must be like minded in their principles and sympathies; and they must be sensitive enough to feel with one another and to give back the thoughts which are expressed by one or the other, if their intimacy is to be worthy of the sacred name of friendship. There are four services which this most precious gift of God secures for us.

I CORRECTION. (Vers. 5, 6) "Open rebuke is better than hidden love better than the love which hides from a friend its disappointment or its dissatisfaction with him. The wounds of friendship are faithful. Many are they whose character is seriously defective, and whose usefulness suffers considerable abatement from want of discipline; they are not told of their faults, they are allowed to go on deepening their roots and multiplying their fruits, because no wise and faithful friend is near to say, "Pluck out and prune." What no authority may dare to speak, love can say without fear and with excellent result.

II REFRESHMENT. (Ver. 9) We who are weary travellers along the path of life often need that which refreshes our spirit and turns languor into energy, gloom into gladness of heart. For that we look to friendship; it is as "ointment and perfume" to the senses. We may be jaded and worn, but the look, the grasp, the words, of our friend reanimate and renew us.

III CONSOLATIONS. (Ver. 10) We may do well to avoid the house of our kindred in the day of our calamity, especially if we have passed it by in the time of our prosperity; if our "brother" has been kept or has kept himself at a distance. But the "neighbour that is near," the friend that has been "sticking closer than a brother" will not shut the door of his heart against us. He is the "brother who is born for adversity;" he will claim the right of friendship to open his heart, to pour forth his sympathy, to offer his succour, to befriend us in every way in which affection can solace and strength can sustain us.

IV INCITEMENT. (Ver. 17) It is the opportunity and the high privilege of friendship to urge to honourable achievement, to rekindle the lamp of holy aspiration when the light burns low; to sustain Christian devotedness when it is putting forth its strength, by every possible encouragement; to hold up the hands of that consecrated activity which is fearlessly speaking the truth and diligently building up the kingdom of Jesus Christ. C.

The Pulpit Commentary (1880–1919), ed. H.D.M. Spence-Jones & Joseph S. Exell — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

Open - When it is needful, in which case, though it put a man to some shame yet it doth him good. Better - More desirable and beneficial. Secret love - Which does not shew itself by friendly actions, and particularly by free and faithful reproof.

John Wesley, Explanatory Notes Upon the Whole Bible (1754–1765) — public domain. Text via the GEBible commentary corpus.

The third pair of proverbs passes over from this special love between husband and wife to that subsisting between friends:

5 Better is open accusation

Than secret love.

An integral distich; meeאהבה has Munach, and instead of the second Metheg Tarcha, after Thorath Emeth, p. 11. Zckler, with Hitzig, incorrectly: better than love which, from false indulgence, keeps concealed from his neighbour his faults, when he ought to tell him of them. That would require the phrase אהבה מסתּרת, not מסתּרת. Dchsel, in order to accommodate the text to this meaning, remarks: concealed censure is concealed love; but it is much rather the neglected duty of love - love without mutual discipline is weak, faint-hearted, and, if it is not too blind to remark in a friend what is worthy of blame, is altogether too forbearing, and essentially without conscience; but it is not "hidden and concealed love." The meaning of the proverb is different: it is better to be courageously and sternly corrected - on account of some fault committed - by any one, whether he be a foe or a friend, than to be the object of a love which may exist indeed in the heart, but which fails to make itself manifest in outward act. There are men who continually assure us of the reality and depth of their friendship; but when it is necessary for them to prove their love to be self-denying and generous, they are like a torrent which is dry when one expects to drink water from it (Job 6:15). Such "secret" love, or, since the word is not נסתּרת, but מסתּרת, love confined to the heart alone, is like a fire which, when it burns secretly, neither lightens nor warms; and before such a friend, any one who frankly and freely tells the truth has by far the preference, for although he may pain us, yet he does us good; while the former deceives us, for he leaves us in the lurch when it is necessary to love us, not merely in word and with the tongue, but in deed and in truth (Jo1 3:18). Rightly Fleischer: Praestat correptio aperta amicitiae tectae, i.e., nulla re probatae.

Keil & Delitzsch — Biblical Commentary on the Old Testament (1861–1891) — public domain (CC PDM 1.0). Text via the HelloAO Bible API. (Old Testament only.)

What is the friend, who will be a real blessing to my soul? Is it one, that will humor my fancies, and flatter my vanity? Is it enough, that he loves my person, and would spend his time and energies in my service? This comes far short of my requirement. I am a poor, straying sinner, with a wayward will and a blinded heart; going wrong at every step. The friend for my case is one, who will watch over me with open rebuke; but a reprover, when needful; not a flatterer. The genuineness of friendship without this mark is more than doubtful; its usefulness utterly paralyzed. That secret love, that dares not risk a faithful wound, and spares rebuke, rather than inflict pain, judged by God’s standard, is hatred. (Lev 19:17 .) Far better the wound should be probed than covered. Rebuke, kindly, considerately, and prayerfully administered, cements friendship, rather than loosens it.†1 The contrary instances only prove, that the union had never been based upon substantial principle.

Many indeed profess their value for a true friend; and yet in the most valuable discharge of friendship, they "count him their enemy." The Apostle had some just apprehension on this account, though so wise and affectionate, and speaking from the mouth of God. (Gal 4:12-16 .) As if the rule of friendship was, that we should absolutely "please," without reference to the Divine restriction — "for good to edification." (Rom 15:2 .) Christian faithfulness is the only way of acting up to our profession. And much guilt lies upon the conscience in the neglect.

But this open rebuke must not contravene the express rule of love — "telling the fault between thee and him alone." Too often, instead of pouring it secretly into our brother’s ear, it is proclaimed through the wide medium of the world’s ear; and thus it passes through a multitude of channels, before it reaches its one proper destination. The openness of the rebuke describes the free and unreserved sincerity of the heart, not necessarily the public exposure of the offender; save when the character of the offense, or the interests of others, may appear to demand it. (1Ti 5:20 .)

But never let a false tenderness be suffered to dilute a paramount obligation. Could Paul have answered to God for his secret love to a brother apostle, when the compromise of a fundamental principle called for open rebuke? (Gal 2:11-14 .) Obviously however the sin should be brought to view, ere we rebuke. Nor should we vehemently reprove involuntary slips (See Sir 19:16 ); much less forget the exercise of a loving spirit. Leighton’s gentleness gave such a power to his reproof, that rare was the repetition of the offense; rather however from shame, than from the new principle. The mark of true godliness is an anxiety to have our faults pointed out; and a thankfulness to those who undertake the self-denying office.†2 ’A faithful reprover is a very great help in our Christian course. He is to be valued above the greatest treasure.’ ’He that would be safe’ — says one of the ancients — ’must have a faithful friend, or a bitter enemy, that he may fly from vice by the monitions of the one, or the invective of the other.’†3 Much more valuable is this faithfulness, than the smooth politeness of the world’s intercourse. Nay, some defect in this courtesy may be excused for the sake of the sterling quality.

The truest friend of man — his wounds are faithful. He will not pass by a single fault in his people. He acts upon his own rule from the most considerate regard to their best welfare. And who would not choose this faithful wound, however painful at the moment of infliction, rather than the deceitful kisses of the enemy?†4 The kiss of the apostate was a bitter ingredient in the Savior’s cup of suffering.†5 His foreknowledge of the treachery,†6 in no degree weakened those exquisite sensibilities, which, from their intimate union with the Godhead, rendered him susceptible of suffering beyond all comprehension.†7

Footnotes:

†1 Pro 9:8; Pro 28:23 . Mat 18:15 .

†2 Neh 5:7-13. Even when given most rashly and unkindly, one of the meekest of men could say — ’I was thankful to God for admonishing me, and my gratitude to the man was, I think, unfeigned.’ In his journal, the reprover’s name was found specially remembered in prayer. Martyn’s Life, chapter 3.

†3 Bp. Kidder.

†4 Pro 26:23-26. Neh 6:2 .

†5 Mat 26:48-49, with Psa 41:9 ; Psa 55:12-13 .

†6 Joh 6:70; Joh 13:18-26 .

†7 Philip Henry beautifully describes the proper offices and uses of Christian reproof. ’To reprove a brother is like as, when he is fallen, to help hip up again, when he is wounded, to help to cure him; when he hath broken a bone, to help to set it; when he is out of the way, to put him in it; when he is fallen into the fire, to pluck him out; when he hath contracted defilement, to help to cleanse.’ — Life, chapter 10.

Charles Bridges, An Exposition of the Book of Proverbs (1846) — public domain. Text from a community e-Sword module.

Better is an open rebuke

The abstract noun "rebuke" can be expressed with the verb "rebuke." AT: "It is better to be openly rebuked" (See: Abstract Nouns)

than hidden love

"than love that is not openly shown." The abstract noun "love" can be translated as a verbal phrase. AT: "than to be loved secretly" (See: Abstract Nouns)

Faithful are the wounds caused by a friend

"The wounds that a friend causes are trustworthy." The word "wounds" here represents the pain and sadness that a person feels when a friend rebukes or corrects him. (See: Metaphor)

Faithful are the wounds caused by a friend

The trustworthiness of a friend's rebuke is spoken of as if the sadness that his rebuke causes is trustworthy. AT: "Though it causes sadness, a friend's rebuke is trustworthy" (See: Metonymy)

but an enemy may kiss you profusely

It can be stated clearly that the enemy's kisses are not trustworthy. AT: "but the enemy's many kisses are not trustworthy" or "but an enemy may try to deceive you by kissing you profusely" or (See: Assumed Knowledge and Implicit Information)

profusely

"abundantly" or "too many times"

translationWords

rebuke

love

faithful

adversary

kiss

unfoldingWord translationNotes — © Distant Shores Media and the Door43 World Missions Community, licensed CC BY-SA 4.0. Source: git.door43.org/Door43/en_tn.